Friday, August 8, 2008

Funny meanings

Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
---------------
Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.
---------------
Marriage:It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
---------------
Divorce: Future tense of marriage
---------------
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.
---------------
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
---------------
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
---------------
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water power.. .
---------------
Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.
---------------
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
---------------
Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
---------------
Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.
---------------
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
---------------
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
---------------
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
---------------
Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
---------------
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
---------------
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
---------------
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
---------------
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
---------------
Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
---------------
Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
---------------
Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway See I am not injured yet.
---------------
Pessimist:A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY
---------------
Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
---------------
Father: A banker provided by nature.
---------------
Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.
---------------
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
---------------
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
---------------
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Bollywood stars name : then and now

Aamir Khan - Aamir Hussain Khan
Ajay Devgan - Vishal Devgan
Ajit - Hamid Ali Khan
Akshay Kumar - Rajiv Bhatia
Amitabh Bachchan - Amit Srivastav
Ashok Kumar - Kumud Ganguly
Bobby Deol - Vijay Singh Deol
Dev Anand - Devdutt Pishorimal Anand
Dharmendra - Dharam Singh Deol
Dilip Kumar - Yusuf Khan
Govinda - Govinda Arun Ahuja
Jeetendra - Ravi Kapoor
John Abraham - Farhan Abraham
Johnny Lever - Badruddin Qazi
Kamal Haasan- Alwarpettai Aandavar
Kumar Gaurav - Manoj Tulli
Lucky Ali - Maqsood Mehmood Ali
Madhubala - Mumtaz Jehan Begum Dehlavi
Mahima Chaudhry - Ritu Chaudhry
Mallika Sherawat - Reema Lamba
Manoj Kumar - Hare Krishna Goswami
Nana Patekar - Vishwanath Patekar
Raj Kumar - Kulbushan Pandit
Rajesh Khanna - Jatin Khanna
Rajnikant - Sivaji Rao Gaekwad
Rekha - Bhanurekha Ganesan
Salman Khan- Abdul Rashid Salim Salman Khan
Sanjeev Kumar - Haribhai Jarivala
Shammi Kapoor - Shamsher Raj Kapoor
Shashi Kapoor - Balbirraj Kapoor
Sunil Dutt - Balraj Dutt
Sunny Deol - Ajay Singh Deol
Tuntun - Uma Devi Khatri